Serenity

Dear God,

All I want to have is a stable life, a simple yet happy family and a partner that will love me and stay with me endlessly. Now, I'm on a state of life that is so confusing. Remember the last time I talked to you? I cried. I cried because I feel so ashamed because somehow, I forgot you.

God, I'm not in a hurry but please let me see the person who will be with me on the next chapter of my life. Somethings bothering me, does he still love me? does he still remember me? I want to talk to him, maybe I just need to hear that everything is over. Then maybe I would stop. But I need to stop. Stop. Stop. Slowly.

I have to move slowly. Continuously chasing him is not helpful. I should stop doing this, I need to focus on what life bring in. 

God please let me find my own happiness. I'll wait 'til the right time comes. 

What's your plan?

After graduating, all I wanted to do is to be part of a production team wherein I can interact with the people behind TVCs and Animations—then God grant me what I wish. I met some directors, assistant directors and director of photography which lead me to work closely with media agencies. After 3 months of sleepless nights and hard core shoots I decided to leave the production team I asked for.

Afterwards, I asked myself what I really want to do in my life after college, what I really want to achieve beyond my imagination and then I realized I wanted to be in an advertising company—again, wherein I can interact with the people behind Magazines—then God grant me the “advertising” thing. After 8 months of sales projections, left and right presentations, grave issues and worth saving friendship I decided to quit for the second time, it’s just that I don’t want to stress my life over thousands and millions worth of sales.

Later on, I intently asked myself “WHAT DO I REALLY WANT” well maybe sales is not for me. Then, I asked God again—I want to be in a safe zone of this career not right after I realized that sales is for self-motivated people only or maybe I’m just stupid and desperate to think like this. Then God grant my prayer. After two months of unemployed mode, I enjoyed hanging out with friends, travelling with family—enjoying life to the fullest.

Then, I became part of this super confidential-so quiet-so minimal knowledge-spooky PR company. I stayed for almost 1 year but I got bored due to monotonous work and robotized system of the company until I felt like I waste almost one year of my life reading newspapers, scanning ads and editing—continuous boredom indeed.

Right after that, I worked again in publishing company, I got terror boss but she’s the best, I didn’t hear anything bad from her she is my savior every Monday meeting. I met people and make them as good friends until now. Though there are times that salaries are delayed we still keep on holding that the company will provide what we need.

At his very moment, I’m in this state of confusion that I want to leave again—because of the depression over quota, there is no such thing as stable in this journey. Being part of this prestigious company is already an honor unfortunately, AGAIN, sales is not for me I must say. After more than 3 years of working in advertising world, I then again realized that this my world. Advertising is my bread and butter, it nurtures me and thought me a lot of things in life, advertising contribute so much knowledge and strategies in my life, it made me appreciated that there’s no easy job in this lifetime, it made me understood that everyday should be a very productive and hard working day for each of one of us doing a campaign and the people behind every project. So when you see an ad in a magazines, newspapers, TV, radio and in all platforms of media please give attention to read and appreciate it, that makes us proud :) we gave all our best shots, those sleepless nights, liters of tears, series of meetings, hundreds of revisions, shootings on a weekend and holidays all of these are priceless. I owe everything to advertising and to those people who trained me well to be in this position right now.

I am planning to leave again on the 16^th of the following month. With or without rebound I’ll leave because I’m already decided. Thing is, am I matured enough to think this way?? I someone say this “you can teach someone to be a good sales person, but you can’t teach them maturity”.

 

Moral lesson guys:

1.     Identify your WANTS and NEEDS— Remember! You work because you want to earn money, you work because you sustain your families’ needs, because you’ll able to pay your credit card bill, you can buy hi-tech gadgets, you can do everything you want because you earn your own money but mind you kid! Money can’t buy KNOWLEDGE.

2.     Don’t be afraid to try something new- This is a classic example for the fresh grads out there. Choosing your desired job and position is not bad but don’t be so picky as well when it comes to work. It’s not that you’re not qualified but you are just lack of experience. Remember! This is win-win situation. The company needs your service and you need the company for experience purposes.

3.     Cherish your stay in the company- This is a must guys. For sure you will meet nice, sweet, terror, rumor monger, cool, hardworking etc. It’s a matter of how will you handle this instances. Cherish everyday of your life in the company.

(Oh I miss writing) please feel free to leave a message and I’ll do my best to answer all your queries :)

Have a blessed day guys! :)

love and understanding

ako na yata ang pinakaunderstanding na tao sa mundo (please lang wag mo kong taasan ng kilay, syempre biro lang yun). bakit kamo? anim na buwan na ang nakalipas mula nang iniwan ako ng taong inakala kong makakasama ko habang buhay.

punong puno ako ng panghihinayang. mali ba ako? siguro. kaya nga kami naghiwalay eh. 

ayoko nang tapusin ang kwentong ito dahil sa tatlong bagay:

1. dapat ko na syang kalimutan 

2. dapat akong maging masaya sakanya sa kanyang napiling buhay at

3. dapat hanapin ko ang tunay kong kasiyahan

habang ginagawa ko ito, tinig ni Sir Noel Cabangon ang background music ko. simple lang, gusto ko kasing umiyak at namnamin ang sakit na hindi ko dapat iniisip. para lang akong praning dahil naghahanap ako ng dahilan para masaktan at magalit.

gone

I'm alone. I'm left. I'm disappointed. God you know how hard it is for me to accept this. I am trying to be strong not just for myself but for my future. He left me--actually we left each other willingly.

 "do not put your happiness in someone else's hand, because when he left so as your happiness"

granted

 Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.

-Jeremiah 33:3

I miss writing on my blog. I was so busy paying attention on my new job. Just this morning I realized I’m turning 24 soon, and then I think again, a few months ago I remember promising myself to look for a job wherein I’ll have a stable source of income. My 6^th month is on December, and on the same month I’ll be turning 24. What life will bring to me? That I don’t know…that will surely depend on God’s will. I am praying again for the progress of my career in advertising, as I am embracing this path I am taking. I love the environment, I love the nature, I love the pressure, I love the people, I love the salary of course and these things I love were all at my prayers few months ago. God really knows what is good for us; I am very much thankful for all the blessings I’m receiving. From my family, my friends, neighbors, colleagues, partner, work, pet, etc. So true, if you ask, he’ll answer. Just come. Just ask. Just pray. He will never let you down. :) keep praying everyone. 

hold on

dearest,

though there were times you made me cry and gets me upset, i want you to know that i am giving you one last chance-- chance to prove me that i am wrong, chance to bring back the trust that you broke for just a second, chance to bring back my feelings towards you. you know how very disappointed i am for what you did, you witnessed how many tears i'd shed that night because i can't explain my feelings, i can't imagine you did it-- you did cheat on me you shit!, you know i have respect and trust on you but now it all fades away. before that night ended, you promised me  you'll be honest, that you'll say everything and not going to hide again. since i love you i believe...again. but when i'm alone i realized it was also me made a mistake, i didn't let you explain (but you dins't even utter any) :( so sad why men are like this. you keep on promising and we stupid make believe. dearest, let me remind you and i am damn so serious THIS WILL BE YOUR LAST CHANCE! hey please pay attention on this :( i love you but please be careful, include me on your decisions, consider me on actions. you know how hard it is for us, let's work on this and save until we can-- but if not, let's not push it through, it's awkward to love when we're in doubt. i'm still hanging on...i still believe...i will...as long as i can...as long as we can...as long as you love me...

answered prayer

thank you God for granting my wishes, finally. i know this opportunity you gave will help me to be a better person and it'll mold me into much grown colleague to others. i promise to treasure this new career you've given, i'll strive and work hard to prove myself that i can do things beyond my limits. yesterday, my final interview for the vice president for marketing and luckily, my experiences impressed her. and so, they gave mo job offer. that very short moment made me a quick decision to sign and accept the responsibility as advertising account manager. i thank you God for your faithfulness in me. way back weeks ago in st. catherine cathedral in dumaguete, i prayed for this opportunity. i talked to you as if your just in front of me, i said please give me job wherein i can excel on my chosen field and earn money so i can help others especially the rbi kids. i thank you God for everything, i promised to keep my promise, i promise to work so hard to keep this job on my hand, i promise to be a good person, i promise to help others. i may broke some of my promises but you i know i'm trying to be a good human. Lord, thank you is not enough, i know you know how much thankful i am for this. please help those who pray for a career growth as well. guide me God to this new journey i am taking to. please lead me and give wisdom so i can work passionately. again, i thank you God for this new career. thank you. iloveyou.