salamat

Dearest,

Before I finally say goodbye to you, I'm not saying that I'm defensive nor not yet over you but you know that you don't have enough courage to see me and so I decided to write a letter.

I would like to thank you for being part of my life, thank you for accepting me in my most craziest thing, in the ugliest side of my attitude and for making me a much better person. Gusto kong malaman mo na isa ka sa pinakamagandang nangyari sa buhay ko, marami man akong naging pagkukulang sayo, patawarin mo sana ako. 

Salamat sa tatlong taon ng pagmamahal at pagaalaga na binigay mo. Hindi ko inakalang tatagal ng tatlong taon ang away-bati nating relasyon, akala ko nga pang 2 months lang tayo dahil ang OA mo sakin. Hindi ko man laging nasasabi noon pero sobra sobra ang pasasalamat ko kay God nang makilala ka para mahalin ko ng higit pa sa sarili ko. Pasensya ka na kung may mga bagay tayong hindi mapagkasunduan sabi mo nga brave ako--hindi ako natitinag ng kahit anong problema. Brave ako dahil alam kong may isang katulad mo na masasandalan ko pag naging mahina ako. 

Thank you for making me feel that I deserve to be loved not just love but to be well loved. Salamat sa walang sawang pagsundo at paghatid sa school man o sa office, salamat sa napakahaba mong pasensya sa kakulitan ko, sa pagiging moody ko pag "dalaga" ako, sa pagiging matigas ng ulo ko at napakarami pa. Kung may isang bagay akong hindi makakalimutan yun ay ang mahigpit at sincere mong yakap. Salamat sa yakap mong nakakaalis ng pagod at takot, salamat sa napahigpit at napakasarap na yakap mong nagpapaalala na hindi ako nagiisa na may isang katulad mo na hindi ako iiwan o pababayaan kahit anong mangyari, sa biglaang yakap mo na sobrang minahal ko, sa yakap mong nagsasabi na hindi mo ako iiwan. 

Noon, inisip ko--pano na ko? wala ka na, pano na ko? wala na yung taong sobrang mahal ko, pano na ko? wala na kong masasabihan na mahal na mahal na mahal kita.

Salamat sa mga memories na binuo mo kasama ako. Minsan ko ng sinabi sa sarili ko--hinding hindi ko hahayaan mawala ka, hindi ako aalis o mawawala

Paalam na, siguro nga hanggang dito na lang tayo, siguro nga hindi ako ang the one para sayo, siguro nga kailangan mong mawala sa buhay ko para marealize ko ang tama para itama at ang mali para itama.

Salamat.

-
Me

Serenity

Dear God,

All I want to have is a stable life, a simple yet happy family and a partner that will love me and stay with me endlessly. Now, I'm on a state of life that is so confusing. Remember the last time I talked to you? I cried. I cried because I feel so ashamed because somehow, I forgot you.

God, I'm not in a hurry but please let me see the person who will be with me on the next chapter of my life. Somethings bothering me, does he still love me? does he still remember me? I want to talk to him, maybe I just need to hear that everything is over. Then maybe I would stop. But I need to stop. Stop. Stop. Slowly.

I have to move slowly. Continuously chasing him is not helpful. I should stop doing this, I need to focus on what life bring in. 

God please let me find my own happiness. I'll wait 'til the right time comes. 

What's your plan?

After graduating, all I wanted to do is to be part of a production team wherein I can interact with the people behind TVCs and Animations—then God grant me what I wish. I met some directors, assistant directors and director of photography which lead me to work closely with media agencies. After 3 months of sleepless nights and hard core shoots I decided to leave the production team I asked for.

Afterwards, I asked myself what I really want to do in my life after college, what I really want to achieve beyond my imagination and then I realized I wanted to be in an advertising company—again, wherein I can interact with the people behind Magazines—then God grant me the “advertising” thing. After 8 months of sales projections, left and right presentations, grave issues and worth saving friendship I decided to quit for the second time, it’s just that I don’t want to stress my life over thousands and millions worth of sales.

Later on, I intently asked myself “WHAT DO I REALLY WANT” well maybe sales is not for me. Then, I asked God again—I want to be in a safe zone of this career not right after I realized that sales is for self-motivated people only or maybe I’m just stupid and desperate to think like this. Then God grant my prayer. After two months of unemployed mode, I enjoyed hanging out with friends, travelling with family—enjoying life to the fullest.

Then, I became part of this super confidential-so quiet-so minimal knowledge-spooky PR company. I stayed for almost 1 year but I got bored due to monotonous work and robotized system of the company until I felt like I waste almost one year of my life reading newspapers, scanning ads and editing—continuous boredom indeed.

Right after that, I worked again in publishing company, I got terror boss but she’s the best, I didn’t hear anything bad from her she is my savior every Monday meeting. I met people and make them as good friends until now. Though there are times that salaries are delayed we still keep on holding that the company will provide what we need.

At his very moment, I’m in this state of confusion that I want to leave again—because of the depression over quota, there is no such thing as stable in this journey. Being part of this prestigious company is already an honor unfortunately, AGAIN, sales is not for me I must say. After more than 3 years of working in advertising world, I then again realized that this my world. Advertising is my bread and butter, it nurtures me and thought me a lot of things in life, advertising contribute so much knowledge and strategies in my life, it made me appreciated that there’s no easy job in this lifetime, it made me understood that everyday should be a very productive and hard working day for each of one of us doing a campaign and the people behind every project. So when you see an ad in a magazines, newspapers, TV, radio and in all platforms of media please give attention to read and appreciate it, that makes us proud :) we gave all our best shots, those sleepless nights, liters of tears, series of meetings, hundreds of revisions, shootings on a weekend and holidays all of these are priceless. I owe everything to advertising and to those people who trained me well to be in this position right now.

I am planning to leave again on the 16^th of the following month. With or without rebound I’ll leave because I’m already decided. Thing is, am I matured enough to think this way?? I someone say this “you can teach someone to be a good sales person, but you can’t teach them maturity”.

 

Moral lesson guys:

1.     Identify your WANTS and NEEDS— Remember! You work because you want to earn money, you work because you sustain your families’ needs, because you’ll able to pay your credit card bill, you can buy hi-tech gadgets, you can do everything you want because you earn your own money but mind you kid! Money can’t buy KNOWLEDGE.

2.     Don’t be afraid to try something new- This is a classic example for the fresh grads out there. Choosing your desired job and position is not bad but don’t be so picky as well when it comes to work. It’s not that you’re not qualified but you are just lack of experience. Remember! This is win-win situation. The company needs your service and you need the company for experience purposes.

3.     Cherish your stay in the company- This is a must guys. For sure you will meet nice, sweet, terror, rumor monger, cool, hardworking etc. It’s a matter of how will you handle this instances. Cherish everyday of your life in the company.

(Oh I miss writing) please feel free to leave a message and I’ll do my best to answer all your queries :)

Have a blessed day guys! :)

love and understanding

ako na yata ang pinakaunderstanding na tao sa mundo (please lang wag mo kong taasan ng kilay, syempre biro lang yun). bakit kamo? anim na buwan na ang nakalipas mula nang iniwan ako ng taong inakala kong makakasama ko habang buhay.

punong puno ako ng panghihinayang. mali ba ako? siguro. kaya nga kami naghiwalay eh. 

ayoko nang tapusin ang kwentong ito dahil sa tatlong bagay:

1. dapat ko na syang kalimutan 

2. dapat akong maging masaya sakanya sa kanyang napiling buhay at

3. dapat hanapin ko ang tunay kong kasiyahan

habang ginagawa ko ito, tinig ni Sir Noel Cabangon ang background music ko. simple lang, gusto ko kasing umiyak at namnamin ang sakit na hindi ko dapat iniisip. para lang akong praning dahil naghahanap ako ng dahilan para masaktan at magalit.